Start with the Right Mindset

A recommended first step is to read Go-Givers Sell More by Bob Burg and John Mann. They offer powerful insights on redefining the sales process as an opportunity to give and help, rather than simply to take and close.

At Anthony Cole Training Group, we use the #1 sales assessment in the industry by Objective Management Group, which defines the 21 Core Sales Competencies needed for sales mastery. Among these, the competencies for the Relationship Builder are critical to success. See below.

The Seven-Second Window

Here's an important reality: seven seconds is the average length of time a person has to make a first impression.

If that first impression falls flat, a salesperson is unlikely to get another chance with that potential client. But when they nail it, the client takes them seriously from the start. Trust begins to form immediately.

And trust is everything. Without it, prospects won't share their real issues or discuss money. They won't consider making a change, and they certainly won't commit to a next step.

Whether the initial meeting is face-to-face, over the phone, or via video, salespeople don't have time to waste. Understanding how people form first judgments (and what they can control) makes all the difference.

What Really Influences First Impressions

When meeting face-to-face, a majority of how a salesperson is judged comes from non-verbal data: appearance and body language. Less than 10% is influenced by the words that they speak. People do, in fact, judge a book by its cover. When the initial encounter is over the phone, 70% of how a salesperson is perceived is based on their tone of voice and 30% on their words. Clearly, it's not what a salesperson says - it's the way they say it.

Building Credibility Fast

Another excellent resource on this topic is The Speed of Trust by Stephen M. R. Covey. According to Covey, "The good news is that we can increase our credibility and we can increase it fast, particularly if we understand the four 'cores' that are fundamental":

1. Integrity - Do you walk your talk?
2. Intent - Are you genuinely seeking mutual benefit?
3. Capabilities - Can you actually deliver what you promise?
4. Results - Do you have a track record of success?

A Proven Opening Approach

With the need for strong first impressions in mind, here's a suggested approach to open a first meeting that accelerates rapport building:

Understanding the Prospect's Mindset

Of course, prospects bring their own barriers to building rapport. They're busy and distracted. They've done their homework and know more than salespeople often assume. And they've had experiences (good and bad) with other salespeople that shape how they view this interaction.

Here's a valuable exercise for every salesperson:

Think about a recent encounter where you were the buyer and a salesperson really "got" you. Maybe it was at a store, a service provider, or even a B2B situation.

• What was that experience like? What made it stand out?
• What specific things did that salesperson do or say that made you feel understood?
• How did their approach make you more willing to open up or move forward?
• What can you replicate from that experience in your own sales conversations?

This reflection can reveal powerful insights about building rapport that textbooks can't teach.

Going Deeper Than Surface-Level Questions

In early conversations with prospects, a salesperson's goal isn't just to qualify or pitch. It's to uncover the prospect's real pain. What problems are they actually facing? What have they already tried to solve them? How is their current provider performing, and where are the gaps?

These conversations aren't just about gathering surface-level information. They're about building genuine insight so the salesperson can determine whether a true, mutually beneficial relationship can form. Because at the end of the day, the best sales relationships are built on a foundation of understanding, trust, and the sincere desire to help.

Ready to develop stronger relationship-building skills across your sales team? Download our free eBook The Relationship Selling Guide for proven strategies and frameworks, or contact Anthony Cole Training Group to learn how our assessments and coaching can transform your team's ability to build rapport and close more business.