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Alex Cole-Murphy

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Building Rapport in Sales: The Foundation of Every Successful Deal

Posted by Alex Cole-Murphy on Fri, Feb 06, 2026
 
Nothing is more important in selling than the relationship. And nothing is more important than a salesperson's ability to build that relationship quickly.

Sometimes rapport happens naturally: the conversation flows, trust forms easily, and the prospect seems ready to engage. Other times, it takes persistent effort to gain enough confidence and trust for a prospect to move forward. So what separates salespeople who build rapport effortlessly from those who struggle?

Start with the Right Mindset

A recommended first step is to read Go-Givers Sell More by Bob Burg and John Mann. They offer powerful insights on redefining the sales process as an opportunity to give and help, rather than simply to take and close.

At Anthony Cole Training Group, we use the #1 sales assessment in the industry by Objective Management Group, which defines the 21 Core Sales Competencies needed for sales mastery. Among these, the competencies for the Relationship Builder are critical to success. See below.

Picture1-Feb-06-2026-12-47-17-8840-PM

The Seven-Second Window

Here's an important reality: seven seconds is the average length of time a person has to make a first impression.

If that first impression falls flat, a salesperson is unlikely to get another chance with that potential client. But when they nail it, the client takes them seriously from the start. Trust begins to form immediately.

And trust is everything. Without it, prospects won't share their real issues or discuss money. They won't consider making a change, and they certainly won't commit to a next step.

Whether the initial meeting is face-to-face, over the phone, or via video, salespeople don't have time to waste. Understanding how people form first judgments (and what they can control) makes all the difference.

What Really Influences First Impressions

When meeting face-to-face, a majority of how a salesperson is judged comes from non-verbal data: appearance and body language. Less than 10% is influenced by the words that they speak. People do, in fact, judge a book by its cover. When the initial encounter is over the phone, 70% of how a salesperson is perceived is based on their tone of voice and 30% on their words. Clearly, it's not what a salesperson says - it's the way they say it.

Building Credibility Fast

Another excellent resource on this topic is The Speed of Trust by Stephen M. R. Covey. According to Covey, "The good news is that we can increase our credibility and we can increase it fast, particularly if we understand the four 'cores' that are fundamental":

  1. Integrity - Do you walk your talk?
  2. Intent - Are you genuinely seeking mutual benefit?
  3. Capabilities - Can you actually deliver what you promise?
  4. Results - Do you have a track record of success?

A Proven Opening Approach

With the need for strong first impressions in mind, here's a suggested approach to open a first meeting that accelerates rapport building:

  • Thanks for inviting me in… (or meeting on Zoom)
  • I’m glad we could carve out the time today, and I’m looking forward to hearing more about the issues we discussed over the phone.
  • As you think about our discussion, what would make our time together today a great and productive use of your time?
  • At the end of this meeting, I would like to set aside 5 minutes to determine where we are headed next, if anywhere. Does that make sense?

Understanding the Prospect's Mindset

Of course, prospects bring their own barriers to building rapport. They're busy and distracted. They've done their homework and know more than salespeople often assume. And they've had experiences (good and bad) with other salespeople that shape how they view this interaction.

Here's a valuable exercise for every salesperson:

Think about a recent encounter where you were the buyer and a salesperson really "got" you. Maybe it was at a store, a service provider, or even a B2B situation.

  • What was that experience like? What made it stand out?
  • What specific things did that salesperson do or say that made you feel understood?
  • How did their approach make you more willing to open up or move forward?
  • What can you replicate from that experience in your own sales conversations?

This reflection can reveal powerful insights about building rapport that textbooks can't teach.

Going Deeper Than Surface-Level Questions

In early conversations with prospects, a salesperson's goal isn't just to qualify or pitch. It's to uncover the prospect's real pain. What problems are they actually facing? What have they already tried to solve them? How is their current provider performing, and where are the gaps?

These conversations aren't just about gathering surface-level information. They're about building genuine insight so the salesperson can determine whether a true, mutually beneficial relationship can form. Because at the end of the day, the best sales relationships are built on a foundation of understanding, trust, and the sincere desire to help.


Ready to develop stronger relationship-building skills across your sales team? Download our free eBook The Relationship Selling Guide for proven strategies and frameworks, or contact Anthony Cole Training Group to learn how our assessments and coaching can transform your team's ability to build rapport and close more business.

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Topics: building rapport in sales

Critical Sales Performance Data for Financial Services Selling

Posted by Alex Cole-Murphy on Thu, Jan 15, 2026
 
Many industries will not hire a salesperson without an evaluation to determine the candidate’s level of sales skills. Most of the companies we work with are banks and insurance firms, and while these are not industries that have typically been committed to evaluating, we are seeing a movement in that direction. Bank and insurance leaders now understand that the sales performance data behind that robust resume or smooth interviewer can reveal critical tendencies and potential weaknesses that they need to know before making a job offer.

Banks and insurance firms also now realize that they need to know this same information about their current sales team. It is sometimes difficult to understand what makes the top producers so successful and how to find, attract and develop more of those types of financial salespeople. There is a science to the soft skills world of selling, and sales performance data helps make those skills measurable. We utilize the #1 sales evaluation by Objective Management Group, Inc. (OMG), and here are a few examples of why this sales performance data is so important if you are leading a sales team and must grow the company. If you are a salesperson, understanding this sales performance data is critical to honing your skills and moving up the leader board.

Understanding Sales DNA and Sales Performance Data

Take a look at the chart below. There are 21 core sales competencies listed here and measured by OMG. We are going to focus on the middle group called Sales DNA. Sales DNA can be coached, and it never makes sense to invest in sales training and techniques until your financial firm and salespeople understand the dynamics of Sale DNA and how it affects them and their skills.

Screenshot 2026-01-15 at 9.38.53 AM

Case Study: How Beliefs Impact Sales Behavior and Results

Case study example – It is your goal to train your team on a sales approach that they have not used before with a questioning technique that they do not understand or “believe” in, for example, asking for introductions from their current advocating clients. Some bankers feel uncomfortable or “pushy” doing this, an example of non-supportive beliefs. If we don’t train them first on the impact of their own supportive or non-supportive beliefs, many will not even try the new sales approach, and they will push back and never utilize it. Beliefs drive behavior, and behavior drives outcomes and results. If no change is made, then sales training budgets are wasted on this approach.

Case Study: Staying Present in Consultative Financial Sales

Another case study example – If your salesperson is unable to “stay in the moment,” they are likely to miss critical cues from the prospect because your agent or banker are already thinking of their next question or how to answer the prospect. Many salespeople struggle with this particular Sales DNA factor because they are good at presenting and telling. They are not as skilled at asking more questions, like “Why is that?” or “When did that problem begin?” or “What has your current bank done to address that issue for you?” This more consultative approach is what elite salespeople have mastered. They can listen very closely to the prospect, follow their lead and ask the right questions to help the prospect self-discover why the problem must be fixed. They stay in the moment and are not distracted by previous conclusions they might have had.

Case Study: Discussing Money Confidently in Sales Conversations

One last case study – Your salesperson might have great relationship-building skills, be strong at qualifying, and ask all the best questions of the prospect, but what if they are uncomfortable discussing money? They will often not ask about budget or fees and proceed to the proposal stage without a clear understanding of what the prospect will pay to solve their problem. This is very common with salespeople because, from a young age, they are taught that talking about money is inappropriate and can be uncomfortable. If a salesperson recognizes that they feel that way, then they can practice and become more skilled at asking the money questions.

The reason sales performance data is so important is this: You cannot change what you cannot see. If you need to improve your sales team’s performance and are considering sales training, make certain that your sales training provider utilizes a sales-specific evaluation. It is critical that you understand the data beneath the behavior and can address the root of the sales problem to achieve long-term, meaningful change and results.

Find out how you can evaluate  your team's Competencies!

Topics: sales performance, data driven sales

Elevate Your Team’s Skills with Sales Practice

Posted by Alex Cole-Murphy on Fri, Jun 20, 2025

Every sales leader understands intellectually that practice is an essential contributing factor to the success of their salespeople in the field. Any skill, every skill, whether it is playing an instrument, competing in tennis or basketball or soccer, requires hours and hours of practice. So does becoming a champion in selling. It requires hours and hours of sales practice to refine a successful prospecting approach with a unique and compelling value proposition. It takes hours of practicing the right questions and listening to uncover if there is a real problem that must be fixed. And of course, discovering if there is time, budget, and resources to make a change is an elite skill that only comes naturally if a salesperson is comfortable asking some tough questions. In fact, they must think it is their job to do so.

What makes sales practice difficult is that many salespeople just don’t like it. Here is our advice for the sales leaders: they don’t have to like it, they just have to do it. Once that is made clear, and leaders initiate structured time and scenarios to incorporate into their sales practice plan, salespeople will begin to get more comfortable with practicing sales techniques.

Here are just a few unedited comments made by salespeople about sales practice and role play in our sales training this year:

      • "Allowing us the practice, although uncomfortable really allows me to get a feel for the layout of the conversation and dig deeper to have more successful conversations."
      • "As uncomfortable as roll playing can be, practice makes perfect."
      • "Discussing the different sales bases, what information needs to be collected in order to move forward. The role play & seeing it in action helped me a lot."
      • "Drilling down within my real-life scenarios made be better prepared for my meeting tomorrow than I would have otherwise."
      • "Makes you be prepared. Role play gets to the pain. Am I a commodity or do I bring something valuable to the table other than save you $. Listen, drill down. Lots of good stuff, even for those like me who have been doing this for a long time."

Much like salespeople, sales leaders might not like to run sales practices, but they too just need to do them! It can be difficult for managers because they may feel on the spot to demonstrate how the sales conversation should sound and may not be that comfortable themselves. Yes, to some degree, sales leaders should understand and be able to role play an effective sales conversation. However, here is an effective tip: rely on others. One of the effective approaches for sales practice with a team is to gain the insights from other producers.

Here are some other good guidelines for sales practice and how to role play:

  • Leaders, have regularly scheduled time and topics to role play on your team’s calendar

  • Don’t get too fancy, just dive in!

  • Determine roles: prospect and producer

  • Salesperson should share the opportunity’s background in 5 minutes or less

  • Remember, this is not a strategy discussion; the conversation must be in the role

  • Begin and continue the conversation as you would with your real prospect, making sure the prospect uses typical objections

  • If you need to step out of role play to make a point or gain feedback, state “out of role play”

  • After sales practice, gain feedback and insights from the team

    Screenshot 2025-06-20 at 9.09.39 AM

What should the team sales practice?

If a company is operating without a defined, stage-based sales system, it will be more difficult to create productive sales practice sessions, so start there. Using the ACTG sales approach, here are areas that salespeople should practice to become proficient, along with some tools sales leaders can use in practice sessions:

  1. Making the initial prospecting call: 8-Step Compelling Phone Process Worksheet

  2. Uncovering problems and pain that must be fixed, asking consultative questions to discover if this is a real prospect or just a shopper: Drill Down Questions Worksheet

  3. Asking real questions about time, budget, and resources: Are They Really a Prospect Sales Brew

  4. Overcoming objections and asking about the incumbent are always tough areas and must be role-played!: Winning Sales Pitch Sales Brew

  5. If a prospect is fully qualified, in a sense, they should “close” themselves, but here is an effective approach to sales practice for closing: Critical Closing Questions Sales Brew

Every sales leader would agree, it is important that salespeople practice their sales techniques with co-workers so that they do not practice on their prospects. Improving skills, practicing the game plan, and getting feedback from the practice sessions are crucial for success. Sales leaders, just get started and don’t get caught up in making it perfect. Practice is never perfect.

 


Topics: Sales Training, sales skills, sales practice

Dealing with Rejection in Sales: SW3

Posted by Alex Cole-Murphy on Fri, Jun 13, 2025

Salespeople have to prospect. That's the truth. Salespeople can find their prospects in lots of different ways: introductions, social media, networking, lists, internal referrals from business partners, cold calling, pre-approach email, association memberships, and business networking groups.

What is also true is that no matter how a salesperson gets a name, the next step is to contact them. They can contact them by mail (email or snail mail) or by phone (the most common method). If they are going to have any chance to schedule time to talk with them about their current situation to determine if they are a prospect, they must make contact — and it must be effective contact.

Prospecting is difficult. It is not usually fun. If you are a manager, don't tell your people to "just pick up the phone and have fun with it." They will know you don't know what you're talking about and haven’t recently dealt with rejection in sales.

Facing rejection, not talking to anyone, having people hang up on you, having people ask you to never call again, people lying or avoiding you, not returning calls or emails, pretending to be interested just to get rid of you, asking for free help, taking your info to fix the problem themselves, or canceling last-minute — ZERO FUN. And the list goes on.

If prospecting isn’t fun, then what is it? Here’s another truth: You don’t have to like it; you just have to do it.

Salespeople must put a lot of preparation, emotion, intellect, and skill into being successful at prospecting. Our evaluation partner, Objective Management Group, has found that one of the biggest contributors to sales success is the ability to be rejection-proof. Even with all the skills, techniques, scripts, and preparation, if a salesperson cannot handle the rejection in sales and emotional roller coaster of prospecting, they will struggle, be inconsistent, and fail more than they succeed.

The Strength of Handling Rejection in Sales

When dealing with rejection in sales is a strength, an individual will:

  • Be able to ask tough questions and challenge their customers to earn their respect

  • Remain objective and actively listen to prospects and customers

  • Feel empowered to take positive action without being sabotaged by negative self-talk

  • Push back over price objections, competition, and indecision

  • Lean into discussions about budget and funding

  • Get back on another sales call immediately after being rejected without feeling hurt

In the end, salespeople need to prospect. If they have a solid phone approach so they don’t look, act, and sound like everyone else, they have a chance.

As a manager, if you help them understand the root causes of their prospecting woes (non-supportive beliefs, need for approval, etc.), you can help them improve. If you make them practice so their phone conversation is as natural as breathing, they’ll improve their results.

Dealing with rejection in sales is all about being resilient. Here’s our easy-to-remember philosophy: SW3Some will, some won’t, so what, move on.

Recently, one of our insurance producers shared this:

“I used to get hung up on rejection, but now I follow the model: some will, some won’t, so what, move on. That mindset shift has been incredibly freeing and has helped me stay focused and resilient.”

The bottom line is that rejection in sales isn’t fun. It’s about getting the job done — being resilient and tenacious in your prospecting efforts so you have solid appointments that turn into solid opportunities that turn into closed business. THAT’S where the fun is: new relationships and new opportunities to help clients.

Do You Need More Leads? –  Free Sales Prospecting eBook Download

Learn How to STOP Hiring Mistakes at our 30-Min Webinar on June 16th!

Hiring 30MIN Webinar


Topics: Sales Training, rejection, rejection in sales

How AI is Changing Sales & What That Means for Salespeople

Posted by Alex Cole-Murphy on Thu, Apr 03, 2025

AI is a leading topic in almost every industry publication these days — from Forbes to Insurance Journal to the American Bankers Association. As it should be, since it is revolutionizing most job functions, including sales and business development.

AI is another tool that offers many benefits for salespeople, and staying informed as AI is evolving will be important. A comparison would be the introduction of the internet and the impact it had on selling. The information that consumers and businesses used to call or visit companies to attain became readily available at the prospect’s desk and fingertips.

Yet salespeople still exist — and thrive — even after the internet changed everything. The key here is that salespeople must stay current with how AI can help them in their role of finding and cultivating clients.

This blog article will cover how AI is changing sales, how it can become a tool for salespeople, where it can help identify opportunities, and why sales skills matter more than ever to compete and be successful.

How AI is Changing Sales: Real-Life Tools Making a Difference

We recently met with the CEO of a small tech firm who has developed software to help target and focus a salesperson’s daily outreach activity. Using AI to evaluate current client data, they serve up a daily lead list of prospects with similar qualities in priority order — with complete contact information — helping salespeople stay focused on prospecting activities that will have the most impact in reaching their goals.

Salespeople no longer need to search around for who they should call, saving considerable time and effort. This tool also minimizes distractions. Think about how easy it is to get on LinkedIn for a purpose and suddenly you're reading posts and looking at connections. All good activities — but not as targeted as a custom-built daily calling list. This is one example of how AI is changing sales.

The role of Customer Relationship Management Systems (CRMs) has evolved over the years, and in today’s world, AI is playing a large part in providing predictive insights from client and industry data. Many CRMs are connected to email automation tools with some level of conversation intelligence — meaning they can read actual customer conversations to predict deal outcomes and forecast projections with unprecedented accuracy.

This is how AI is changing sales: allowing a company to provide data that helps salespeople get smarter and more focused in their business development efforts.

Where AI Helps in the Sales Process

Let’s break down where AI can help salespeople in their daily job. First and foremost, in prospecting with lead scoring and prioritization that identifies warmer leads more apt to respond and engage.

AI can also help in follow-up with automated reminders for appointments and emailing of information, as well as email sequences. These email sequences can be set up to send relevant information to targeted prospects.

We recommend being selective with the use of these automated emails, as those on the other end may be inclined to unsubscribe, causing a future inability for outreach. Relevancy and trustworthiness are the factors determining cold email success in 2025, as just published in a recent Hunter.io study. So, it is important to make certain that in outreach — whether automated or customized (preferred by most) — your messaging is relevant to the end user.

AI can also help the sales process by analyzing calls for coaching purposes and in forecasting, helping companies manage their pipelines with more accuracy and effectiveness.

Why Sales Skills Still Matter

Referencing once again the Hunter.io article: relevancy and trust are the two most important factors when a new salesperson comes calling.

AI cannot build trust, develop relationships, or strategize with a business owner on solutions. AI also does not handle objections like a salesperson can: asking the right questions, uncovering real reasons, and helping prospects navigate the mental roadblocks involved in making a decision.

The power and the value of the sales role is to apply emotional intelligence and relationship-building skills alongside appropriate AI intelligence.

According to the #1 sales evaluation company in the world, and our partner, Objective Management Group, one of the 21 Core Sales Competencies is relationship building, which includes quickly developing rapport and building relationships over time. It is these qualities that drive customers to stay at a company — or follow many salespeople to new companies if they move. As of today, this cannot be replicated by AI.

To illustrate: when a business owner must make a pivotal decision about the business that will alter strategy, revenue, and profit for future years, will they turn to AI or the right consultative salesperson for resources?

Most salespeople have heard about and explored ChatGPT and other similar AI tools that can help them improve their own communication and self-marketing. Salespeople will benefit by embracing these tools, finding time to understand them, and learning how they can help improve their calling efforts and conversations with prospects and clients.

AI is changing sales and is doing so in a positive manner for those salespeople and companies who stay informed and embrace these resources to improve results.


Topics: Sales Training, ai is changing sales


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    About our Blog

    Anthony Cole Training Group has been working with financial firms for close to 30 years helping them become more effective in their markets and closing their sales opportunity gap.  ACTG has mastered the art of using science-based data and finely honed coaching strategies to help build effective sales teams.  Don’t miss our weekly sales management blog insights from our team of expert contributors.

     

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